On Skis from Santa and Microwave Peas ...

Much more visually appealing than a picture of microwave peas

If one cooks peas on the stovetop, one may avoid finding them in the microwave after the meal is finished. However, this is only a bandaid solution. You see, microwavepeasness can neither be created nor destroyed and if not applied to the peas, it will attach itself to something else. It will not bind with the desserts for which one is generally really too full anyway, nor on the bean salad which is not a festive dinner icon. No, its nature is such that it must bind with something iconic like ... oh, I don't know ... Christmas crackers?
They're in the pantry, Mom.